My recent inactivity

iDefy

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I've been completely inactive lately. Here's why.

Last Thursday I swallowed 15 lorarab 10's in an attempt to take my own life. I felt buried in hate and depression. I couldn't handle the way I felt anymore. I wanted the pain to stop, and no matter what I tried, death seemed to be the only remedy. I went to a dark place in my mind, and completely self destructed. I got kicked out, I stopped getting paid, I was about to lose my fiancé. I was in more pain than I could possibly handle. I wrote a final goodbye to all of my family and to my fiancé, and I swallowed every pill I had. When I woke up I was in the ICU. I was technically dead at one point, but apparently I wasn't ready. I spent a few days in a mental Heath facility. I started feeling better, but still numb to everything. I'm still trying to build my life again, so I may not be very active.

Tags:
@sin
@california
@pray
@hey
@pun
 
Damn bro, I hope everything picks up for you in the future. Sorry things aren't going well :(
 
I hope you feel better man, that's definitely the most rough thing to ever go through and the only thing that can help is friends, family, and persistence to get better
 
Hope you feel better, suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem, if you wanna talk, send me a PM, I can listen. :)
 
Glad you aren't dead. Hope you get better, aim or text me.
 
@loot if you're going to be an ass, please refrain from commenting.

@hollywood @sexy @explode @california thanks guys. It'll take a little bit but I'll be okay.
 
Hope everything picks up bro. Glad to see you back.
 
@iDefy

Glad you aren't dead, but disappointed you're back to be honest. Right now, FK isn't one of the places you should be if you just tried killing yourself. Should get your life back together, then come back when you are all better; emotionally, mentally, and physically.
 
zayveN said:
@iDefy

Glad you aren't dead, but disappointed you're back to be honest. Right now, FK isn't one of the places you should be if you just tried killing yourself. Should get your life back together, then come back when you are all better; emotionally, mentally, and physically.
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If he is here, he can get help from people. Why the fuck is ecstasy back? He did the same thing. No one hated on him so hop off and leave him be. He's not in the mood to hear your bitch ass complain I'm sure.
 
My dude I'm really glad you are ok <3 you know I'm here for you bro. Please just talk to me next time man. Being alive is better than not being alive. Ok glad you are ok and will talk to you soon man
 
@zayven Can I not try to find some enjoyment in things I used to? I miss the way I was in October. I'm trying to recreate that. I was happy. Can I not attempt to reconnect with some people? You know some of the members are actually helpful..

@Critical I live in Shawnee now man. If you want to come hang out I'd be more than happy to float $20 to you for gas.

@wall thank you for the kind words. I won't be incredibly active yet as I'm still piecing my life back together but I'll be around.

@critical I appreciate you sticking up for me but I'm sure @zayven didn't mean any disrespect.

@hey What's up man? I'm not back completely just yet, but it's a start. I just couldn't handle the pain that I woke up to and had constantly through my day.

@Barrick thank you man. I appreciate it. It's actually nice to see someone I don't know take an interest in my feelings. Genuine good person.
 
Damn dude. I'm so sorry, if you need anything you know I'm just right down the road. Still looking forward to meeting up sometime soon hopefully!
 
I feel you, but why use something so fun to kill yourself? Hydrocodone is my shit. Stay safe though.
 
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