funny Facebook status ideas

Funny Facebook statuses are a great way to brighten up your social networking profile page.
*decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire!
*One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and too stubborn to ask for directions.
*When someone rings the doorbell, why do dogs always assume it’s for them?
*I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
sometimes, not remembering mey be the better.
*What is fat, ginger and pregnant? Nothing..
*slept like a baby last night…. Waking up every 3 hours crying for food.
*wanted to kill the sexiest person alive…But suicide’s a crime.
*People say that love is in every corner……gosh! maybe i’m moving in circles..
*Why is a newspaper ten times more interesting when somebody across the table is reading it?
*║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║█║▌│║▌║█║▌║▌││║▌║ *ZAP* *BEEP* Price: $7.95
Dear Santa, let me explain…
*I think my girlfriend has had sixty-one boyfriends before me. She calls me her sixty second lover.
*٩(•̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶ ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃•̃)۶
*_̴ı̴̴̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡ ̡͌l̡*̡̡ ̴̡ı̴̴̡ ̡̡͡|̲̲̲͡͡͡ ̲▫̲͡ ̲̲̲͡͡π̲̲͡͡ ̲̲͡▫̲̲͡͡ ̲|̡̡̡ ̡ ̴̡ı̴̡̡ ̡͌l̡̡̡
if only life came with a ◄◄ REW ► PLAY ▌▌PAUSE █▌STOP
*scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal today’s status.

Funny Facebook Status

Having a funny status at facebook can take everyone attentions. It helps also to boost your profile to other facebook members. Here are some of my funny ideas on facebook.


"What you think about, you talk about and what you talk about, you bring about"

You can not get lost on a straight road.

You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax, tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough

Some days... You just don't have enough middle fingers... ya know?

"vampires suck" is gonna be an epic movie