Jealousy.

@california Yeaaah going to the gym in pants is a little bit inconvenient. I workout extensively so it gets really, really hot.
@beware Over my physical attributes; Like what I wear?
 
Sometimes I tell myself, "don't get jealous, its just a friend." But I can't just let other people who are guys talk to my girlfriend. It always been a problem for me. IN EVERY GIRL IVE EVER DATED. I trust my girlfriend on a level where I should killed but hey, we are together still after 1 Year and 3 Months. I check her shit constantly. Such as Instagram, Twitter, Text Messages, Kik, Skype, YOU NAME IT. We are all human, its human for one to think that, "oh maybe this guy/girl can take my love away." I have found not to think in that context. If it were to happen it would've happened already. HONESTLY. Commit to someone and keep it that way. If your man/woman can't do that, that isn't a relationship. Jealously is utterly pointless once you gain that kind of bond with one another. Thats what me and my girlfriend have, THAT CRAZY ASS BOND THAT NOBODY UNDERSTANDS. Honestly, she was the best decision of my life so far, and I'm keeping it that way. SO DO YOURSELF AND THIS GUY A FAVOR. GAIN THAT BOND. JEALOUSLY WILL SLOWLY FADE. Hope this helps, but maybe you won't wanna take advise from a 15 year old. But hey, I tried.
 
@wall I've been close to a person that way; It's the most incredible feeling for sure.
@Beware What do you mean by physical then?
 
Kassie said:
What other stuff do you typically get jealous over?
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If one of her ex's try contacting her, guys complementing her ( depends on the extent ), I get pissed about her past, it's odd typing it because I don't wanna sound like a freak at all haha. But if I see guys speaking with her, I get jealous.

Pretty much past experiences, and contact with others that I do not trust.
Before I said anything about my jealousy to her she had been posting bikini pictures on IG, that was pretty bad for me.
That's pretty much my jealousy in a nutshell.
 

I'm absolutely forbidden from posting bikini pictures on ig, and i thought that was strange.

I think everything you said is understandable.
 
Kassie said:
I'm absolutely forbidden from posting bikini pictures on ig, and i thought that was strange.

I think everything you said is understandable.
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well me and my girlfriend has been dating for 2 years+ now. When we started she was really innocent. Like if girls starting flirting with her they thought they are just being kind. Whenever guys would DM her or try skyping or Facetiming, again she thought that the guys just wanted to talk at 1 in the morning. Then she always wondered why they were so nice at night and ignored her at school. Some being a guy i told her why and she didnt believe it. Then once she started realizing that the guys where only being nice for a certain reason she came to me. Of course i was right she realized that i know what guys are trying to do. So she started to listen to me a little more. Again shes extremely innocent, so she would post bikini pics and wear spandex to school. Again i dont care and it doesnt bother me but i said it will attract unwanted attention. Again she doesnt listen and continues doing what she does. ( Shes very christian, so she will she the good out of anyone). A couple weeks go by an again weirdos are looking at her and randomly trying to msg her. I told her what was going to happen and it did. So i dont really get jealous, but i really trust her and every knows shes mine and always will be. She usually gets jealous of me because i can easily get along with people and i like to have fun, but she see me as like her only friend. Because she has just learned that people are assholes. Shes extremely nice, if someone jokes to her saying like why dont you bake cookies or brownies for me? She will literally feel bad and that same day she will go bake them cookies and when she meets again. They are like i was just kidding........... Shes basically a adult in a teens body. She will plan months ahead and when she tries to make everyone happy, they really dont care for her help. So the then gets sad because some people can be dicks when all she is nice. Again like i said, sometimes its good to be nice but not always and people joke all the time. As usuall i am wrong until she gets hurts. Then i have to not try to seem like an asshole and say "I told you so ". The only time i get jealous really is when she will text other guys. So i talk other girls aswell, but they have been friends with me since like middle school. She will get jelly because she was really quite in middle school so she really has no close guy friends, and i have alot of close girl friends. I dont see how because she is beautiful. So trust plays a huge role in a relationship. Jealousy can ruin a relationship so weve learned to listen to me ha jk but i try to help her become more people smart and she tries helping me be more open, because i dont tell anyone shit. We are the perfect couple because opposites greatly attract and we help eachother with our weakness`. I know most outcomes of certain situations so ill tell her what may happen and she can take my information if she wants to. So ill let her do her until she gets hurts and we learn from it and our trust for each other grows more. So im not really controlling but from experience i usually get my way and she will stop what i dont want is going on by like reverse psychology. I dont know everything but i know a few things about girls and relationships. TRUST will keep a relationship togehter, jealously will ruin a relationship and might lead to cheating. You can always be to controlling which is always bad because most people will go against what is told to them. Thats my view on that. Sorry i go a little off topic I hope you enjoy my essay and sorry if theres alot of errors and brain farts
 
@porsche I think trust and jealousy are both necessary in certain degrees in a relationship and balance each other. If there is no jealousy and absolutely no desire to control anything, I think that's a poor relationship as well. A relationship without boundaries isn't healthy imo.
 
I'm more protective than jealous..

Jealously in my opinion is needed in a relationship as it's satisfies that little bit of doubt that your partner might not care about you. I believe you just have to learn to control it to a point where it doesn't annoy your partner. Personally, I can be really clingy in a relationship and sometimes jump to conclusions a little quickly but I believe I'm easy going and understanding.

One of my problems is that I always see myself below the person I'm with. I don't see myself in a good light at all. I have so many insecurities it's ridiculous. I always see the person I'm with in a perfect light. Jealously just depends on the person. Some people need the jealous and insecure girl (me) because they can get through all of that together. Then you have the guy that needs the confident girl that he can show off to the world and such. There just needs to be a balance for a successful relationship in my opinion.

I think people just need to find that balance that works for them. Sometimes it's just not meant to work out though, something I've learnt the hard way after two stressful and fun years.
 

Typically I see myself mentally superior and physically inadequate in comparison to who I'm dating. But I really switch between insecure and confident. Despite the two, jealousy is pretty much a constant.
 
Kassie said:
Typically I see myself mentally superior and physically inadequate in comparison to who I'm dating. But I really switch between insecure and confident. Despite the two, jealousy is pretty much a constant.
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Eh, the two vary for me.
I always seem to pick the wrong person.
Insecure is the one word that describes me. Jealousy for me has always been a pain. It can be the smallest things that just hit me and then I worry about them for a awhile and then just come clean and mess things up. At least I know my faults though.
 
Im a jealous fuck because i've been hurt so many times by girls. Its definitely a turn off for some of them. Doesn't matter, im a fucking loser. Im done with girls </3
 
@deuce I'm the exact same way. You've been with your girl for a while though and it's good right?
@alt It's a turn off to some people, but I like it when my boyfriend gets jealous. It makes me feel like I must be reeeeally special if he gets that worked up about it. Don't give up; There are good girls who will appreciate everything you have to offer, even your jealousy.
 
Kassie said:
@deuce I'm the exact same way. You've been with your girl for a while though and it's good right?
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It's been a little eh lately to be honest, I don't know where we stand.
It's long distance and that just multiplies my jealousy five times. It's been an ongoing and off going thing over the past month.
 
Deuce said:
It's been a little eh lately to be honest, I don't know where we stand.
It's long distance and that just multiplies my jealousy five times. It's been an ongoing and off going thing over the past month.
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My last relationship was long distance. It was hard because he's over 21, so he can drink. But I was really uncomfortable with him out drinking without me and yeah. It was really tough. I don't know if I'd be willing to do long distance again.
 
Kassie said:
My last relationship was long distance. It was hard because he's over 21, so he can drink. But I was really uncomfortable with him out drinking without me and yeah. It was really tough. I don't know if I'd be willing to do long distance again.
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Yeah, I get that. I'd be too stressed if i dated someone who was a party goer or heavy drinker. I'm pretty clean, so dating someone who drinks a load and smokes everyday wouldn't be the right path for me, especially in a long distance relationship. That's why my last came to end to be honest.

Personally, I love long distance. I think it helps you get to know the person better and you learn how to make the relationship work. Also, trust and working around small issues is needed for it to last. They take much more effort but are worth it. Also, seeing each other is worth the year or months wait.
 
@deuce He was a very heavy partier/drinker before we met and toned it down when we dated because I never drink or party, even though I am of age.

Yes! That aspect is the best. Hanging out physically is nice, but there it's a lot more silent because touching is available. Long distance opens up that connection so much sooner and etches it out so much deeper.
 

Finally someone who agrees.
I just dislike drinking to be honest though, I've lost too many people because of stupid decisions they made whilst intoxicated so I've decided against it for the most part.

I feel as though long distance relationships last longer if the people arwho compatible and willing. There's so much more you learn and the relationship is never built off of the physical attributes. You actually have to care for someone to make it last and you'll build at your own pace when together. There's so much silence in close relationships than long distance where you're compelled to talk to each other or Skype as much as possible because it's the closest you'll get for a period of time.
 
Man FUCK jealousy. This shit has and always will get the best of me and I hate it.
When I was younger, I got jealous over the dumbest shit ever. I used to always make a deal out of it too, but I've learned to control myself.
Usually I keep about 90% of the stuff I'm jealous about to myself and don't say shit simply because I don't want to deal with it/don't want to start anything over what is essentially nothing.

It's fucking impossible for me to put what I'm feeling in words right now, I can't even begin to explain how this shit has affected me. Ahhhhhhhh.
 
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