This is a good frined of mine and he is a Ranger. This is what he posted on a forum to answer a question. I laughed so fucking hard when I read all of this.
Ranger Looon
Yepper!! Consider the sky to be the canister part of a vaccume cleaner and the plane as the nozel.
I never jumped outta shit. I just walked towards the door until I was sucked out.
Just imagine: The plane takes off.........your heart is already racing..............you then fly around a bit.
The door opens and the air is suddenly rushing around inside of the bird and makes you think to yourself "WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?" You then here that '6 minutes!!'
and your ass tightens and heart starts to beat a little faster. The next 5 minutes goes so fucking fast, that you think the Jumpmaster needs to buy a new fucking watch.........one that can actually tell time.
The Jumpmaster then tells you something so unimaginable: "STAND UP!!!" and you think to yourself "I dont want to stand up for shit!!!"
"But I had better do it so no one might think that Im thinking of crying 'mommy'.
Then they tell you to 'HOOOK UUUUP' and once again you think about mommy. By this time you heart feels like its going to jump outta your chest and you could swear that everone can hear the fucker, over the rushing wind.
Then, when the fastest 5 minutes EVER comes to sudden halt, that fucking Jumpmaster, that can't tell time for shit, turns to you, seeming to look right at your scared ass............puts one hand in the air with his index finger extended, as if he is trying to show you the bugger he just picked from his nose..............and yells "ONE MINUTE"!! Your asshole, at this point, feels like it is turning inside out and the butterflies are about to consume you.
You think about mommy some more.
You then watch that asshole look out the door and turn around and shows you the length of his dick, and yells (at you) "30 seconds"!!!!
This whole fucking time you realize that you forgot about the lights. That prick, then tells the first poor bastard to "STAAANNND INNNN THE DOOOORRR!!!"
Now, you are looking for your mommy!!! and your heart is about to do it's best 'Alien' immitation.
Then you see the fucking light turn green. You would shit yourself, but can't!! Thats because it would be physically impossible. (see above).
The towers aren't even close, to what actually throwing your body out of a plane is like!!!!
Ranger Looon
Yepper!! Consider the sky to be the canister part of a vaccume cleaner and the plane as the nozel.
I never jumped outta shit. I just walked towards the door until I was sucked out.
Just imagine: The plane takes off.........your heart is already racing..............you then fly around a bit.
The door opens and the air is suddenly rushing around inside of the bird and makes you think to yourself "WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?" You then here that '6 minutes!!'
and your ass tightens and heart starts to beat a little faster. The next 5 minutes goes so fucking fast, that you think the Jumpmaster needs to buy a new fucking watch.........one that can actually tell time.
The Jumpmaster then tells you something so unimaginable: "STAND UP!!!" and you think to yourself "I dont want to stand up for shit!!!"
"But I had better do it so no one might think that Im thinking of crying 'mommy'.
Then they tell you to 'HOOOK UUUUP' and once again you think about mommy. By this time you heart feels like its going to jump outta your chest and you could swear that everone can hear the fucker, over the rushing wind.
Then, when the fastest 5 minutes EVER comes to sudden halt, that fucking Jumpmaster, that can't tell time for shit, turns to you, seeming to look right at your scared ass............puts one hand in the air with his index finger extended, as if he is trying to show you the bugger he just picked from his nose..............and yells "ONE MINUTE"!! Your asshole, at this point, feels like it is turning inside out and the butterflies are about to consume you.
You think about mommy some more.
You then watch that asshole look out the door and turn around and shows you the length of his dick, and yells (at you) "30 seconds"!!!!
This whole fucking time you realize that you forgot about the lights. That prick, then tells the first poor bastard to "STAAANNND INNNN THE DOOOORRR!!!"
Now, you are looking for your mommy!!! and your heart is about to do it's best 'Alien' immitation.
Then you see the fucking light turn green. You would shit yourself, but can't!! Thats because it would be physically impossible. (see above).
The towers aren't even close, to what actually throwing your body out of a plane is like!!!!
