So me and my best friend are sitting around town at like 11pm and shit hoping to score a profit like usual. We see some dude walking alone and he looks scrawny as shit. I tell my friend and he notices a nice pair of headphones that he has so we decide to follow him for a bit. Turns out he was going the same direction we hoped he would have went. He was heading down this cycling track that we always hit up kids on.
He's a couple blocks ahead of us now cause we're two fat fucks but we managed to catch up to him by using the barrel roll technique (rolling on the ground like a barrel to gain momentum.) He turns his head and notices us rolling up to him and I'm pretty damn sure he thinks we're trippin' on shrooms or something so he pays no attention to us. Now would have been a good chance to strike but I wanted to savor the moment.
I walk up to him all e-thuggish and say "Nice headphones mate." He replies with a "cheers" and continues walking off. I thought to myself he must not give a fuck or doesn't know the subtle hints that he's about to get fucking robbed. So I catch his shoulder with my hand and asked him if he's going to give up his headphones before we take them from him and he started laughing as if someone ripped a big fart and it sounded wet. So I assure him my seriousface.jpg and pulled out my butterfly knife that I got from my fathers-fathers-grandsons-sisters-mothers-husbands-son as a birthday present. Now I would have assumed he would break down like other people and just give up the goods. He let the words "try it" slip out of his sly mouth and before I knew it he kicked me in my one weak spot known as the chicken wing. Here's a picture of it:
My eyes swelled up with tears so much. I haven't cried like that since my mother told me I couldn't get the chicken dinner special from KFC for myself last week! Meanwhile I'm crying like a bitch my 'friend' just sits there not knowing what to do seeing as he's never apart of this shit and is just my wingman.
We walked home (me with a limp) unsucessful and decided to aim our careers to pizza delivering.
He's a couple blocks ahead of us now cause we're two fat fucks but we managed to catch up to him by using the barrel roll technique (rolling on the ground like a barrel to gain momentum.) He turns his head and notices us rolling up to him and I'm pretty damn sure he thinks we're trippin' on shrooms or something so he pays no attention to us. Now would have been a good chance to strike but I wanted to savor the moment.
I walk up to him all e-thuggish and say "Nice headphones mate." He replies with a "cheers" and continues walking off. I thought to myself he must not give a fuck or doesn't know the subtle hints that he's about to get fucking robbed. So I catch his shoulder with my hand and asked him if he's going to give up his headphones before we take them from him and he started laughing as if someone ripped a big fart and it sounded wet. So I assure him my seriousface.jpg and pulled out my butterfly knife that I got from my fathers-fathers-grandsons-sisters-mothers-husbands-son as a birthday present. Now I would have assumed he would break down like other people and just give up the goods. He let the words "try it" slip out of his sly mouth and before I knew it he kicked me in my one weak spot known as the chicken wing. Here's a picture of it:
My eyes swelled up with tears so much. I haven't cried like that since my mother told me I couldn't get the chicken dinner special from KFC for myself last week! Meanwhile I'm crying like a bitch my 'friend' just sits there not knowing what to do seeing as he's never apart of this shit and is just my wingman.
We walked home (me with a limp) unsucessful and decided to aim our careers to pizza delivering.